When you think about the idea of losing weight, does your mind start imagining all of the things you’ll have to say no to along the way? “Will I have to give up dessert?…Will I need to stop eating out?” Given that the process and result is called weight loss, of course you’re going to think of what the potential costs might be! I don't know the exact questions that run through your mind, but it can be easy for concerns to pile up as you think about the weight loss process.
Considering costs and potential losses is part of how you evaluate risk and make decisions. However, I'm not really talking about the brass tacks of what will be involved in your weight loss journey because each path is different. And while some paths will have you avoiding desserts for a while, others won't! I'm talking more about the overall sensation you might have about losing weight that leaves you feeling like you're going to lose, or miss out on, more than you'll gain from it. This idea of loss can be a big one that affects your mindset about your weight loss journey!
Maybe the messaging around you has told you that you’re going to have to give up everything you enjoy about food (and life in general) if you want to lose weight. But on the other hand you're also hearing some messaging telling you that you won’t have to give up anything to lose the weight you’d like to lose. The truth lies somewhere in between when the process is healthy.
Worrying about what you might lose from entering a weight loss journey comes from feeling like things could get taken away from you. Like somehow you will be forced into making choices you don't want to make. Whether you specifically think about loss around your food choices, lifestyle habits, or something else, having a mindset focused on cost and loss will leave you feeling pretty vulnerable. And while vulnerability itself is ok and a natural part of doing anything new, we don't want the kind that leaves you feeling like a victim of the situation. So let's talk about how you can flip the script on losing out and move toward weight loss feeling empowered!
Winning, by Choice!
If we're honest, any time we try to break out of the old and experience something better, it's uncomfortable. As you're embarking on a new season with weight loss, and ultimately are creating a new lifestyle for yourself, I can guarantee some things will feel less than positive at first. You just might run into that feeling of 'losing out' too, and that's ok. But one of the most helpful things you can keep in mind is that your feelings toward your journey and the specific choices you make will change over time...for the better!
The reality is, even when we want an outcome we don't always feel like doing what it takes to get it. Most people like the look of smoothly, neatly placed bedding, but starting the practice of making the bed? Not so much. If we yield to the apathy or don't press into the discomfort, that bed will never get made. Stepping into any new, healthy habit will almost always have you facing feelings like that at the beginning. When that happens, you have to make choices that supercede how you feel! Eventually you won't feel that resistance and you'll make that healthy choice without even giving it a second thought!
While you’re actively working on weight loss, your goals will require you to make some healthy choices you won't feel like making at first, but when you embrace your goals you’ll be able to make those choices more easily. And you'll get to enjoy the benefits of those choices too. What once seems like "losing" or missing out on something won't feel like that when you're actively making powerful choices.
Everything looks different when you make decisions from the inside-out, rather than outside-in. If you see it like someone or something outside of you, such as a nutrition plan, or even a "should" is forcing you to make a choice, you will feel that powerless, losing out type of feeling. But when you make decisions, no matter how small, from a posture of taking full ownership of them, that changes everything. It demolishes that feeling of losing out!
As you focus on staying committed to your bigger goals, like feeling better in your body and enjoying improved health, it will keep the small decisions in perspective too. Saying no when you’d normally feel like saying yes, gets easier. Saying yes to a challenge when you don’t really feel like it also gets easier. Even when choices feel less than fun or even challenging at first, keeping that good end result in mind and focusing on taking ownership of your choices in the present will shift how it all feels to you along the way!
Saying No is Saying Yes
Many times saying no to something means you’re also saying yes to something else simultaneously. Any time you make an uncomfortable choice to say 'no' that helps you stay aligned with your goals, you’re really saying yes to your goals! And any time you say yes to a new habit that’s in line with your goals, you’re saying no to staying where you’ve been. Keeping the other side of the coin in mind as you make decisions will change how you see the choices you make! You'll be able to see what you're ultimately gaining from your choices.
Losing to Gain
Improving your health through weight loss is a huge benefit of its own, but there are many side benefits you can experience from a healthy weight loss journey too. Alongside the changes in your body, it can also have you losing mental and emotional weights, and gaining strength in your ‘muscle’ to make powerful choices. The process of weight loss carries the potential to bring you a lot more than you could ever lose.
Spend time thinking about how you could experience more physical energy, better sleep, reduced mental fog, less pain in your joints, increased confidence, improvement in your medical conditions, and more. It can be a life-giving journey for you that takes you to somewhere you’d like to be.
Have a mindset focused on gain!
This suggestion isn’t just for the sake of staying positive, it’s so you’ll be able to enjoy your journey and gain every bit of good you can from your process. Thinking about all you could gain will bring energy to your process while thinking more about the potential losses will only steal your energy about it. So, if your mind goes to what you might miss out on to lose weight, remember to look again at the things you're hoping to gain from the experience! The path of weight management looks different for everyone and along the way you may discover you won’t need to give up as much as you once thought!
Ask: What Can I Add?
When I first entered the world of nutrition as a student, I tended to think more about what needed to come out of our diets in order to see healthy changes take place. Yet as I continued to learn I encountered a big paradigm shift that changed how I saw things. I came to realize the power of adding beneficial things to a diet! Adding things like protein, healthy fats, fiber, vitamins and minerals can shift things as much as or more than removing other things can. No amount of taking things away that you enjoy like ice cream, popcorn at the movies, or the sweet drink from the drive-thru will give you those nutrients your body needs.
Removing or decreasing your consumption of certain things usually is still part of the equation, but I challenge you to think more about what you can add to your diet and your life that will bring value to your health! Throughout your weight loss journey, there will be foods, drinks, habits, and patterns that you will say no to and others that you will say yes to. When you spend more time looking at what to say yes to, the no’s happen naturally. For example, when you begin to prioritize protein at your lunch meal, you’re more likely to say no to the extra afternoon snack because you simply won’t be hungry for it. Staying more focused on what you’re adding to your life than what is changing or going away during your weight loss process is key to having a positive experience.
'Know Thyself'
One of the biggest contributors to the success of your weight management journey has to do with your ability and willingness to take an honest review of yourself! You have to know where you are, where you want to go, and what you're willing to do to get there. Doing this helps give you a more full perspective about it all, including those things that look like losses at first glance.
That being said, knowing yourself and being aware of how you relate to your goals is an ongoing process that comes from being present. So just start with “here,” and “today.” Today, how do you feel about the process of losing weight? Today, what is your mindset about it? What is your long-term goal as you see it today? What are you willing to do today to move toward that goal? Answering those questions can also help you discover what you’re willing to ‘lose,’ what you’re willing to say no to, and also what feels like too far of a stretch for you right now.
It matters most what you say to those questions, throughout your weight loss journey. Because no matter what that person suggests online, or that book tells you to do to see results, it matters more what you decide you’re wiling to do to see the results you’d like to see. Instead of looking at choices and feeling like “I have to” it will become “I choose to.” While in reality you’re always in charge of your choices, it makes a difference when you know that you are!
And if you can't quite get to that point where you feel empowered about your choices on the weight loss journey, why not reach out for some guidance? If you feel anxious about what you’ll have to let go of when you imagine the process, you may benefit from working with a health professional who can guide you through the process in a way that keeps you closer to your comfort zone while still letting you stretch towards your goals.
Don’t let looming questions about the weight loss journey provoke you into thinking it’s all about loss and losing out. It’s not true! Begin to move toward your weight loss goals when you can recognize how free you are to make powerful choices along the way. Take with you a mindset that looks most for the good there is to gain, and for the healthy thing you can add to your plate or your lifestyle. Shift your mindset away from lack and loss, because you're about to get back more than you give along the way!
Get RD Nutrition is a virtual nutrition counseling practice for residents of North Carolina- offering weight management counseling, right where you are!
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